getting over

a lot of things i wanna get over this time...well i've been doing it for the last few weeks. its lil' relief actually. but how come everytime i look at the picture, there is still that heartache. my heart is still being pinch.

thanks to those people who listens to my sentiments. no matter how i said it many times...over and over again.

well, i hope its getting all the way!

random thoughts:

i think i like someone, but i think i dont. *blah* i really dont know why....i wanna get over this...please! or maybe im just confuse,

i think i hate some people, but i cant hate them forever...*get out of my head* ...please! or maybe my syndrome is just attacking me, over and over again. hahah!... i like to call it "my syndrome"

i want to buy some things ive been dreaming to have, but i cant, *sob*...i need more money ...please!...oh well i need to save for it...lot of savings to do, which i cant do too.

oh well one thing's for sure...im scared...scared to face the truth... that if i look at the picture...i will be hurt again. (actually its not only one picture....but lots of pictures, enough to crumple my poor heart)

so better end it up before its too late again!

 

*ang gulo ng utak ko*

i dunno for the last 3 weeks i got different illnesses....3 weeks ago i had acid reflux that lasted for a week...i was always blurping and a sharp air goes out into my mouth and nose...my stomach also aching after eating or if im hungry....it is so painful....

last week i got allergy also...my body turns red esp. my two arms...my face, my stomach and back and it goes down to my legs...it became worse because my arms and feet swollen....and my arm was so painful that i did not sleep for a night it started swelling...

then this week i had terrible headaches..the only solution i take on this is sleep...gosh i dunno whats happening to my health lately....

                                                           My friends.....

        Juvel, Jave a.k.a ScottJuvicel, Me & Yhong...this was after Yhongs birthday party...

I dunno why i really like this song. Im not a fan of Green Day but i heard their songs when i was also in highschool...we'll i would like to share this to everybody...somehow the meaning of the song, describe how my life right now...how i feel for being loveless and alone here in Califonia....

I am so glad for Dave....he had made it...i hope that it would continue til he really gets what he wants  to. Though sad that this time I couldnt hear you singing...but i hope someday i wil got to see the things that you did in Canadian Idol....

Go Dave Moffatt....lift up your powerful voice.....

hi everyone....its been so long...

well i will just make it short...this day we went to Marina Del Rey in The Warehouse restaurant for a birthday party. Mostly are black people were there because the celebrant is a black lady friend of my aunt...they are nice too..at first it was boring coz we dont know anybody there aside from the celebrant...then later we've come to know and talk other peopl at the party...i was so amazed how these people dress...the party was formal and i had to wear formal too...mostly every woman there were in black dress...and me too...its my second time to attend the party of black people.... 

This is my unlucky day....

I supposed to go to magic mountain in Six Flag to have fun with friends, Me and my friend decided to pick me up in the office this morning so I should stay in the office where I work. Its my aunt's office anyway...they owned it. And I usually go to the office on Saturdays for an overtime...The office has an alarm. I also know the code and everything....but when i get inside to disarm the alarm, I miss one number..so i already knew that im in a big trouble. I was already panicky...I repeated the code but still it is on alarmed...I knew something wrong will happen so i just closed the door right away, locked it and sit outside the office..waiting someone to come....*im sure the police will come to interrogate me*...the alarm on...and the woman *im sure everybody aorund the area*...heard the alarm turned on...they also saw me outside....making phone calls

I was so terrified...I called everyone else thru my cellphone for help...but no one answers my call...i just waited outside sitting there...my friend hasn't come yet...for like 15 minutes the alarm shut off...then the phone in the office rung..im sure its the alarm company...to check for what happened...upon hearing the phone rings..i went inside the office....but i forgot i locked the door...so i was in hurry unlocking the door....but the phone call already stops....i was not able to answer it...

I decided to just stay inside the office coz its to hot outside...then after couple of minutes after i went inside...the police came...as i was expecting...the lady police came inside to ask me....i explained what happened...they advised me to call right away or i should answer the phonecall of the alarm company...coz they will charge us if the police will came....then the police look for my ID..i showed it to her...then they left...

To Aringa sisters - Grace, Jean & Jo ann:

I know that this moment is one of the greatest trials of your life....loosing "Aying" - your dearest grandmother...but I know that you will overcome all these guys. I may not there by your side right now to comfort you and to ease up the feeling of lonliness you have but my heart and mind are with you.

May God give Aying peace and eternal life in heaven.

I Love you guys.....
   Dave, Clint, Bob & Scott

I really miss you so much...

...i miss you like crazy

even more than words can say...

...i miss you like crazy
every minute of everyday..

Its time to celebrate...Thanks GOD for helping me out...for giving me a another chance to live my life normally...I thought that would be the end...i dont have to worry that much now about my problem...thanks for few people who console me with my problem...esp. to my only friend here...Jave..I hope that everything will back to normal...though there's already that flaw but i hope time will ease this...but whatever may happen...im willing to accept it....

I would  promise i will not do the same mistake again...I already had my big lesson...that would never forgot for the rest of my life...and i will keep my promise with God that i would be good...that i would be contented and willing to wait...not pushing things out...I would focus on my work, my  family, to God and to myself...I hope I could forgive myself too for what i did....


Hope that all the fears i have inside will gradually gone...


Praise God for his kindness.....damn to people who made my life miserable....